Welcome to TsuKata's Org*
This is the first time I've owned a domain, so I'm kinda just having fun with it right now. I work a full-time job, and I have a full-time life so chances are that by the time I finish doing something, it's out of date. Have patience, and most of all, have fun!
Got questions? Got problems? Got milk? Then e-mail me 'cause my milk, as always, has gone bad.
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Monday, September 30, 2002
Happy Birthday, Babycakes...
Hope you're enjoying that infinite bandwidth no-lag connection...
And I guess you can call the following my little rememberance medley...I've been collecting the lyrics that have reminded me of you, sweetie...hope these bits reach your bits somewhere out there. :) (Links to translations and references follow.)
nee aishitara daremo ga konna kodoku ni naru no
nee kurayami yori mo fukai kurushimidakishimeteru no
nani mo kamo ga futari kagayaku tame kitto
kimi o kimi o aishiteru
kokoro de mitsumete iru
kimi o kimi o shinjiteru
samui yoru mo
nee koi shite mo dare ni mo itsukaowari ga kuru no
nee aozora yori mo sundatokimeki sutete shimau no
kisetsu kawaru no kazemichi o hashiru zutto
tatoe ashita nakushite mo
anata o ushinatte mo
dekiru kagiri no egao de kayagakitai
namida de ima yobi kakeru
yakusoku nado iranai
kimi ga kureta taisetsu na tsuyosa dakara
hitomi de ima yobi kakeru
yakusoku nado iranai
hitomi de ima te o nobasu
samui yoru mo
All I know
Time is a valuable thing
Watch it fly by as the pendulum swings
Watch it count down to the end of the day
The clock ticks life away
It's so unreal
Didn't look out below
Watch the time go right out the window
Trying to hold on, but didn't even know
Wasted it all just to watch you go
I kept everything inside and even though I tried, it all fell apart
What it meant to me will eventually be a memory of a time when
I tried so hard and got so far
But in the end, it doesn't even matter
I had to fall, to lose it all
But in the end, it doesn't even matter...
Pride can stand a thousand trials
The strong will never fall
But watching stars without you
My soul cried.
Heaving heart is full of pain,
oh, oh, the aching.
'Cause I'm kissing you...
Touch me deep, pure and true,
Gift to me forever
'Cause I'm kissing you
I'm kissing you...
Where are you now?
Where are you now?
'Cause I'm kissing you...
I woke up in a dream today
To the cold of the static, and put my cold feet on the floor
Forgot all about yesterday
Remembering I'm pretending to be where I'm not anymore
A little taste of hypocrisy
And I'm left in the wake of the mistake, slow to react
Even though you're so close to me
You're still so distant, and I can't bring you back
It's true that the way I feel
Was promised by your face
The sound of your voice
Painted on my memories
Even if you're not with me, I'm with you...
We fall to the floor, the rest of the day stands still
Fine line between this and that
When things go wrong I pretend the past isn't real
Now I'm trapped in this memory
And I'm left in the wake of the mistake, slow to react
Even though you're close to me
You're still so distant, and I can't bring you back
No, no matter how far we've come
I can't wait to see tomorrow
No matter how far we’ve come
I can’t wait to see tomorrow
With you
Lyrics from:
The Vision of Escaflowne, "Yahsoku Wa Iranai", Translation in PDF format or E-mail me for translation.
Des'ree's "Kissing You" from the Willam Shakespeare's Romeo + Juliet Soundtrack
"In The End" and "With You" from Linkin Park's Hybrid Theory
Sunday, September 29, 2002
Whew...
Well, I have accomplished nothing in the way of unpacking and getting ready to go to work tomorrow, but I have gotten my tk-listmail down to 45 messages from Armchair_Slash and 29 messages from PoU. The past 10-12 days have been fast-paced but nonetheless, massively enjoyable. Thank you to everyone who was a part of them... I want to write so much more. I want to talk about how beautiful Michigan is at the beginning of fall...the amazing sight of the dunes on Lake Michigan (they're HUGE)...tasting wines in Paw Paw (of all places)...smiling nonstop...seeing two friends, one old, one new, take a step that no one anticipated them taking
...sitting around a bonfire talking Tolkien, Astrophysics, and SEIV, planning ASSCon 2003 (long story!)...reading slash on my PDA on a plane and realizing the lady next to me might very well be reading along...crying unabashedly (on a plane, no less) over the "It's not your fault/don't fuck with me" scene in Good Will Hunting...re-uniting with Ryan's Arizona friends and meeting (at long last) his very wonderful (no wonder he liked her) other ex-girlfriend, Jenn...talking about him, his flaws, his loves...his getting drunk ...all the things I miss... I want to set up pictures, but I also want to e-mail and chat with everyone I've missed. This week will be no less hectic for me...in fact, I'm seriously beginning to wonder how much dead time I'll have between now and Thanksgiving. ;-) This is *not* a complaint. It's an admission of excitement, anticipation...if any of the upcoming weeks live up to the past one, I will definitely not complain.
Friday, September 27, 2002
Home...for the next 12 hours at least :)
Just got home and got settled...now it's time to unpack Arizona and pack Michigan. ;-) Talk more later. :)
Thursday, September 26, 2002
Torg Potter and The Sorcerer's Nuts
Get sorted at http://www.sluggy.com
This is the comic. Is it not nifty? Worship the comic.
Am v. v. disturbed, too. (introspective rambling)
At least today I am. I'm also rampantly wanton (blame the fanfic!), and depressed because I don't think I'll ever get what I want. That won't stop me from trying...because it's what I want...but I wonder sometimes if I will end up regretting it. I have accepted that I am insatiable...no matter how much I have, I will want more...and getting what I want only causes me to set my wants even higher. But worst of all, I am attracted to anything that moves (to use the old bi quote)...and I want to make him (whoever the him is, even if the him is a her) adore me above all others whether the ranking is mutual or not...because I can, perhaps. Or because I feel that I have something to prove. Or because I need to be adored more than I need to adore others...but at the same time, I am not just attracted...I love, too. But..as I was mentioning to someone the other day, it's like it's a competition, and as always, I must be the best or else, why bother? :) What, after all, is the point in second place? :)
"Never doubt that I am exactly what you think I am... You cannot change me. Face it...you don't really want to change me. My existence, however abhorrent, justifies yours."
Heh. And just to prove the point, I'm not telling you where the quote is from. Consider it a chocolate chip cookie....OF EVIL! Bwah ha ha...
Wednesday, September 25, 2002
Am v. v. bad girl.
Anyone want to punish me? ;-)
Heh. I didn't wait until lunch. I read it right then and nearly missed lunch because I was so absorbed. I want the evil! I want self-confidence and honesty and someone who isn't going to back down! I want someone who wants stuff as much as I do, and isn't at all apologetic for it! And he must also be very good in bed. Swoonworthy. ::sigh:: I'm cursed. Cursed, I tell ye...
JOY!
So I read and loved Love Under Will while sitting in the jacuzzi the other night...and I thought I was done with it for awhile (sadly), as I had printed out all the chapters, including the most recent one. Only today, I was reading reviews and I was like...wait...I haven't read that???? So I went back and it turns out the printer missed the last 3 chapters! yay! More LUW enjoyment!
Now I just have to make myself wait until lunchtime to finish it!
Joe rules my world. :)
TsuKata: how'
TsuKata: how's life in the land of autumn?
sirezx: how now brown cow
sirezx: nice, the children are singing songs of cheer, the birds are dancing and Joe rules all
TsuKata: :-)
sirezx: Joe has taken over autumn and will be ruliing upon your return.
sirezx: :-)
I miss Joe. :)
Monday, September 23, 2002
Wanderlust
So I drove around for awhile...about an hour I think. Got some things I needed from Walgreen's. Ended up at the Fry's shopping center Ryan and I went to when I was here. I had forgotten how massively different this area is from Palatine. The street signs are phosphorescent, for example. They glow. Walgreen's has itty bitty little shopping carts. They're the size of shopping baskets but with wheels. Nothing is hung from wire...all the streetlights and signs are on solid metal posts. The library looks like a nice restaurant, and it's called The Sunset, which is just strange. Libraries aren't supposed to have names. There's a Fry's for everything...food, electronics, walmartyness, drugstore... And it's hot, but not like back home. It's hot like an oven is hot. Anyways...came back here...went swimming in the hotel pool, which was a perfect temperature...and then sat in the jacuzzi for a half hour and read Love Under Will, which is the latest fanfic of my adoration. Must say I was not that impressed with the other two I brought with me so far...one was a parody of draco sinister, but it didn't seem like a good one...just random people having sex everywhere...I certainly didn't get an incestuous thing from DS...anyways, I got squigged and quit it. Started reading Paradigm of Uncertainty, but I must say that even though I'm on chapter three, I'm still a little bored. The characters aren't doing anything appealing. Hermione is just wandering about smarming over Harry. The only thing I thought was cool was that she killed off Ron in the first couple of paragraphs (she the author, not she Hermione). Whereas LUW had me hooked within a few pages.
Unsurprising revelation: Neither PoU nor the parody featured Draco prominently (thus far). Perhaps I should add to my list of qualifications for a fanfic that it must feature my favorite sarcastic Slytherin, else I will pout menacingly at it, and (most likely) stop reading. :)
Another revelation: I was telling someone the other day that I feel like I'm meant to live in Illinois right now. That's true. I've felt that for awhile. It's like I'm bonded to the place, even though I'd never lived there before my internship in '99. Well, I'm meant to be in Arizona right now too. I think I needed to be close to his memory for a bit. Bet he's having fun playing the eternal FPSs...no lag where he's at. :)
And a quiz for ye, m'darlin':
WATER OF AIR. You're aloof, depressed and seasoned. You'd make a good psychologist, executioner, black widow, arsenic poisoner, heretic queen or commentator. You're too witty for your own good. Have to get up early in the morny morn to fool you, as you spot lies a mile away. And WOE TO THOSE who dare attempt such a stupid move. You're Jamie Lee Curtis in Halloween, when she cuts Michael's head off. You're Anne Robinson, the host of The Weakest Link! Quizcreated by Polly Snodgrass.
News
Well, we know what happened to Ryan now. He had a heart attack. Pretty much what I expected, but my mood is suddenly shot to hell. He was probably so scared. I should have been there. I should have been here with him. Oh fuck....
In AZ!!!
I've arrived. It is hot. :) But my hotel and my car are both well air-conditioned :) Yay. :) Taking today to just get adjusted, unpacked, etc. Starving right now as it's been 8 hours since I ate. But I'm trying to wait until 5:30ish local time to eat. Hey, I should change blogger over to post in AZ time for this week. ;-) It's 4:42pm here right now.
Sunday, September 22, 2002
Bad blogger, no cookie.
I wonder how many times I've had that subject line....
Well, as it happens, apparently LJ has been up to date but blogger has been behind because the blogger server isn't talking to my FTP server happily. I have to use a different blogger server to publish...and I only just now noticed the mention of this issue on the blogger page. ::sigh:: I love being busy, I really do, but I am *so* tired. And I have to go to Phoenix and be happy-joyful-worker-person for a week even though all I really want to do while I'm there is go to Sedona and mourn the loss of someone I miss horribly all the time.
Now publish, damn you!!!!!!!
What Stone Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla
I love that stone! :) Well, it's not my favorite. My favorite is tiger's eye. But this one's cool because it's a heinlein thing. :) yay :) And I think the description is fairly spot on. YMMV.
I'm way overly enthused. I reconnected a good bit with a friend tonight. And I'm considering offering an olive branch to the buttmonkey she's dating, no matter how wrong he is and no matter how much he continuously works so hard at pissing me off.
Friday, September 20, 2002
Funnies From My Dad
"Why does Sea World have a seafood restaurant?? I'm halfway through my fish burger and I realize, Oh my God.... I could be eating a slow learner." --Lynda Montgomery
"I think that's how Chicago got started. A bunch of people in New York said, 'Gee, I'm enjoying the crime and the poverty, but it just isn't cold enough. Let's go west.'" --Richard Jeni
Banned Books
Somewhat relevant to the topic below...although I didn't mean for it to be...here is my list of books that have been banned that I have read:
I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings by Maya Angelou
The Chocolate War by Robert Cormier
The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn by Mark Twain
Of Mice and Men by John Steinbeck
Harry Potter (Series) by J.K. Rowling
Forever by Judy Blume
Bridge to Terabithia by Katherine Paterson
The Catcher in the Rye by J.D. Salinger
The Color Purple by Alice Walker
Sex by Madonna
Earth’s Children (Series) by Jean M. Auel
A Wrinkle in Time by Madeleine L’Engle
Blubber by Judy Blume
Final Exit by Derek Humphry
The Handmaid’s Tale by Margaret Atwood
The Bluest Eye by Toni Morrison
Beloved by Toni Morrison
Deenie by Judy Blume
A Light in the Attic by Shel Silverstein
Sleeping Beauty Trilogy by A.N. Roquelaure (Anne Rice)
Cujo by Stephen King
James and the Giant Peach by Roald Dahl
American Psycho by Bret Easton Ellis
Are You There, God? It’s Me, Margaret by Judy Blume
Lord of the Flies by William Golding
Carrie by Stephen King
Tiger Eyes by Judy Blume
The Adventures of Tom Sawyer by Mark Twain
Song of Solomon by Toni Morrison
Private Parts by Howard Stern
And I'm going to use what's left on that list as part of my reading list for the next week. :) I'm figuring on checking out 4-6 books from the library this weekend, and alot of that list is aimed at kids, so it should be good fluffy reading. But don't let that stop you from suggesting! Suggest, please! :)
Book suggestions!!!
I need suggestions for books to read while I'm gone. I know lots of people have suggested books to me in the past, but only one person was nifty enough to provide me with a spreadsheet list. :) I need a written list to index against the library when I go this weekend. That being said...my qualifications are that I don't care whether it's non-fiction or fiction, but nothing that will be so big that it is unwieldy to carry/pack, and nothing that requires alot of technical/computer/science thought because I'll be doing that every day. Fluffy is good. Light is good. Something not so popular that it will be hard to find at the Palatine Library is good. :)
Thursday, September 19, 2002
Argh.
So I'm going to be in AZ next week for work. You know, AZ, the former home of my formerly alive former boyfriend. But let's forget that for a moment and consider: a) I have almost no unscheduled time between now and when I leave on Monday morning. b) I have a million projects to do at work and this is just yet another "top priority" one for the stack. c) I'm going to miss horseback riding...*just* when I was getting it right. d) I'm going to be away from my wonderful, loving, adorable kitty for 5 days. e) I have a wedding to go to on the Saturday after I return. f) I have to cover my hotel and food and gas and get re-imbursed...and between that and other things, I'm going to be cutting it close this month. g) In order to make things less close, I've decided to return the really cool dress I got from Coldwater Creek. I love it, but I am never going to have a good place to wear it to...or at least by the time I do, I can go buy it again. h) I'm going to be AFK. Minimal e-mail. No BBS. No reading Armchair Slash or Cassie&Rhysenn or Paradigm of Uncertainty.
But...a) it *is* essentially a free vacation to AZ. b) I really wanted to be somewhere close to Ryan's haunts near his birthday. Now I will be. I might even make it out to Sedona while I'm there. c) New malls to shop at!! d) Talk about therapeutic...if I'm going to be a crying bitch over Ryan, that's the time. :) e) This will make me the *only* expert in my state on this particular project. That makes two things I can do that no one else in my area of the company can do. f) I can watch DVDs on the plane (so long as my battery doesn't die) g) I can still check AOL mail and tsukata.org mail, and I can still blog and LJ. h) I can hang out with Ryan's friends in AZ. Share the love.
Wednesday, September 18, 2002
Evil.
Irresistible Poison by Rhysenn (IP 14 out now!) --- evil.
Circles of Influence by Marysia (Ch 5-7 out now!) --- evil.
Harry Potter PC Game --- evil.
Imagining the horse's back is Draco and thus FINALLY posting correctly during a trot --- priceless. :)
A Response to A Friend's Rant on LJ
(re-posted here because I liked it so much)
Disclaimer: I'm not offended, jess...really, I'm not. I just disagree. The following is just my opinion, as yours was just your opinion.
For what it's worth, I get the same "if you don't like it, go somewhere else!" feeling alot. I get so very tired of people who don't appreciate what they've got...that they have a country they can rant in, and how wonderful that is. It's not so much that I think we're the best. We aren't, by a long shot. And it's not that I think people shouldn't have the right to bitch. I bitch constantly about The Way Things Are, but what bothers me is that people bitch without recognizing that any place they go to is going to be flawed...just flawed differently. The advantage of here is that it does change and will change all the time. And I also just get tired of bitching every now and then and want to just tell whoever to go screw themselves, even if "whoever" is me. ;-)
On the second item...I can never ever feel bad for Bush. I'm sure he's got good intentions, but his execution is sloppy as hell. He chose to be president, so my "feeling bad" for him stops right there. In his speech about how badly educated America's children are, he said there should be a copy of the constitution on the internet. Um, there are like 40 copies on the internet, at least. He is the least eloquent president I've seen during my (albeit short...23 years and 11 months) lifetime. His politics piss me off by hiding behind some middle-of-the-road rhetoric while pushing through legislation that makes it harder for women to be educated about their options, creates bias against women in the military who are overseas, limits all of our civil liberties, and supports censorship on the internet. He sure as hell wouldn't be happy about the slash that I read and love on a daily basis. Do you really think that Bush would hesitate in a second to consider H/D slash child pornography just as FFN does? Do you think he'd take the time to make sure that something as innocent and wonderful as Draco Veritas didn't get trashed along with the latest mary sue-potter porno? Do you think he wants 16 year olds such as yourself to have access to all of this? Doubtful. He supports the DMCA. He supports the MPAA and the RIAA. And so, he can bite me if he's feeling down over the criticism. He asked for it.
I'm all for attacking Iraq, but that's because I'm an insensitive arse bent on world domination. I also think Hussein has been asking for it. I don't believe for a minute that he submitted to UN weapons inspections to keep us at peace. He submitted to keep his whiny ass alive a little longer. I was all for attacking Afghanistan and the Taliban 2 years prior to Sept 11th. Why? Because they took American women and treated them by their religious laws with no adequate warning and no diplomatic immunity. They told women that they couldn't leave their homes without a male relative, even for medical treatment, even if they didn't have a male relative. They wouldn't allow women to attend school or set up a medical practice, but they also wouldn't allow male doctors to treat female patients. Women were beaten for showing part of their wrist accidentally. The Taliban destroyed artifacts that were thousands of years old in order to maintain their purist regime. If there was reason to stop Hitler in Germany, why wasn't there reason to stop the Taliban in Afghanistan before Sept 11th? I can tell you why...because Bush et al. were in business with Afghanistan until recently...getting an oil pipeline in place through the country. Bush gave the Taliban significant funding in Feb of 2001. So whenever he got on TV after 9/11 and proved himself a hypocrite by trying to use how bad a woman's life was under Taliban rule as a reason to attack them, all he got from me was a snort of laughter.
I'm glad that you're proud of who you are...but I'm also very proud to be a libertarian non-christian. And the only thing that pisses me off about conservative christians is that too many of them lack your open-mindedness. This is *not* a Christian country so long as my tax dollars are paying for it, and I refuse to be governed by a Christian moral set that I don't subscribe to. I will fight, too. I will fight for what I believe in, and I will fight for the people who are scared to fight. I fight for the little girl who doesn't think it's right to say "under God" in the pledge of allegiance, the child who is pelted with rocks at recess because (s)he doesn't go to church on Sundays, and the little boys who are molested by hypocrisy and never given their day in court. I fight for my friends who are told their love is unnatural, that they deserve AIDS, and that they shouldn't be allowed to provide health care and security for their loved ones.
Too many conservatives *are* like parents; that's the problem. I'm a grown-up. I don't need someone to tell me how to live my life. :) And the more they try to do that, the more I will fight back.
One of my friends (who is conservative) has a quote from Tom Clancy that I like...liberals like to paint pretty pictures. Conservatives like to build bridges you can walk across. I think that assessment is a little more fair...and probably along the idea you were expressing. I agree with it, too...as a generality. The problem is that liberals also recognize that this is a diverse country, and conservatives like to pretend it isn't...or worse, pretend that it shouldn't be.
Wow...that felt good. :) I enjoy ranting. Thanks for the opportunity, huzzahjess. :) ::Hugs:: You rule, chica...and FWIW, when I was 16, I used to say the same things you're saying right now...except the Christian part.
AAAAAAHHHHH!
I am not Harry Potter! I do not fly very well on a broomstick! I only just barely made it through the fourth set of hoops! :-P
(am playing the Harry Potter PC game)
I'm liking the game...it's easy so far, but it is meant for kids after all. My only complaint is that there is no strafing...and having been used to more advanced 3rd person adventure games (e.g., Tomb Raider), I miss the strafing. So the control could use some work. Also it doesn't center to the center height...it centers to just above Harry's head, which makes the camera bump up against arches as you jump. However, I'm loving broomstick practice, even if I suck at it...it's so much fun to go zooming around! :) And I love Madame Hooch telling me that I have a natural talent, even though I bump into the wall within two seconds of her saying it. :)
Macs are pretty!!!!
I'm blogging from a mac. :) It is *so* pretty. :)
Monday, September 16, 2002
Bandwagon
Well, anatsuno did it... :)
As popularized by Friends (although that's probably not how the wagon started in this case), the one night stand list (men), NOT in preference order:
18-year-old Tom Felton (see??? Am not pedophile! Except when watching excessively slashy CoS trailer!)
Tim Curry, particularly if (since i hopped forward in time for Tom) I could hop backward in time a bit, before he ruined himself with Charlie's Angels and bad sitcoms
Rupert Everett...I don't care what he wants, this is about what I want! :)
David Duchovny
Kevin Smith (Silent Bob and Ares2-for-1 special)
John Malkovich
Ryan Phillippe
And probably a million others that I've forgotten...and now the women, which was, perhaps unsurprisingly, alot easier, but is also shorter...I'm pickier when it comes to women:
Reese Witherspoon
Minnie Driver
Angelina Jolie
Renee O'Connor
Alyson Hannigan (another go-back-in-time...I can't stand her as of 2 seasons ago)
Sunday, September 15, 2002
Amelie
Just finished watching this movie as several people insisted that I should see it. Have decided they are all cruel and horrible gits as while it is a wonderful movie, it has made me excessively wanton for mad, crazy, passionate falling-in-love event, which, we all know, will never happen to me. Those sort of things only happen to the good characters that everyone loves...and so far, only in HP fanfic does it ever happen that the evil character gets to have a mad, crazy, passionate falling-in-love event.
Speaking of HP fanfic...I've now had two different people ask me about the Chop Suey/DV connection. I am not surprised that I'm the only person who thought of one...it's a bit of a stretch, admittedly...but it's just these lyrics...if you've read DV9...think about the scene on the tower...
Father, Into your hands I commend my spirit
Father, into your hands,
Why have you forsaken me,
In your eyes forsaken me,
In your thoughts forsaken me,
In your heart forsaken
me
Trust in my self righteous suicide,
I cry, when angels deserve to die...
It's the "self-righteous suicide" part that first caught me...the song just happened to be playing when I was re-reading...and then I started thinking...I love the "forsaken" section anyways. I can barely sing it without crying most of the time...but well, if there is a reason that I love the DD/DS/DV series, it is the fact that I can identify easily with Draco. I think that's what hooked me on fanfic to begin with...I started reading the Draco/Harry/Hermione love triangle when I was dealing with a triangle of my own, just as hopeless or worse, considering that I have no easy access to polyjuice. :) Ah, the things you can do with polyjuice... :) I don't know though...I wasn't hooked anywhere near like he was...but I could understand nonetheless...the frustration of it, and the embarrassment, and the utter annoyance at simultaneously being happy for someone and sad for yourself. And then I read "the marks we bear" recently (by marysia), and I was like, damn...now granted, there were several places in that one where I felt disconnected because of something inconsistent or something OOC...but it was still powerful for me...again because I could identify with Draco. I think that's what defines the fanfic I enjoy...no surprise really. Everyone looks for themselves in their fiction...that's half the point.
"You sense my loneliness, my bitterness at being shut out of life. My bitterness that I am evil, that I don't deserve love and yet I need love hungrily. ... But these things don't stop me. As you said yourself once, I'm very good at being what I am. These things merely now and then make me suffer, that's all."
Bloody Hell.
Note to self: When removing polish from one's toes, one might want to take care considering that one has just gotten a beautiful french manicure this past Thursday. Grr. Oh well...at least it made it through both gaming and a road rallye. :-P
New Quiz
Oh
My
GodI am chatting with Cassandra Claire.
Let me say that again...I...am...chatting...with...Cassandra Claire!!
::fangirlish squee!!!!!!:::::
Saturday, September 14, 2002
New Trailer!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
"MALFOY'S the Slytherin Seeker?!?!"
"You'll never catch me, Potter!"
And some ::shudder:: worthy words from Lucius...oh, yeah... :) At least Lucius is of age.And yeah, yeah, the trailer's been there since Thursday but this is the first time I've had a chance to look at it. :) Visit the official WB Harry Potter site to see the new droolage...
Monday, September 09, 2002
So Totally Worth It
My apartment has *never* been this clean. Even when I moved in. Well, maybe when I moved in. The maid service (Maid Brigade, if you're curious) did an excellent job, and for significantly less than their competitors in this area. Granted, I'm not a horribly messy person...I'm just not good at detail work, and they so totally are. Yeah, they did the basic things I was expecting, but it's the things I wasn't expecting that floored me. They cleaned Maggie's pillow (which was COVERED in cat hair as it's her favorite place to curl up while I'm at the computer), and they organized my shoe pile so that they're all neatly matched and lined up against the wall. They scrubbed my range top to the point that it's sparkling. They vacuumed along the walls, even behind the computer (I left it off today just in case it got bumped or something). They made my bed. They folded my towels neatly. Wow. In about an hour and a half...$80. Wow.
Sunday, September 08, 2002
Stupid US Laws
So I bought a book back in December called "Male Nudes"...a compendium of photographs by Rankin. It had been featured in salon.com's sex section, and I loved the photos. So, while I was in Atlanta with my mom perusing a GLB bookstore, I picked up a copy. I also picked up a copy of Femme Fatale...an equally awesome book of photographs of women. Well, as we're driving to the airport, I'm flipping through my books, and I notice that 3 of the photographs in the Male Nudes book have silver sticky tape over them. The sticky tape was using duct tape style adhesive and it was near impossible to remove it without ripping the pages. I howled in dismay about the back-assed laws of Georgia.
Later, I concocted a plan. I would order the book from Amazon and return the copy I had with the sticky tape on it...surely, Amazon.com would not have copies with sticky tape. That's only some bible belt thing, right? Wrong. It's apparently a US law that forces booksellers and publishers to hide erect penises. I'm not sure of the details, but the Amazon CSR was very helpful and said they'd take it back. So I'm still sending them my old copy and keeping the new copy...but now I have yet another copy with the impossible-to-remove sticky tape. Grr.
Oh and while I was at Games Plus yesterday, some bloody bugger decided to steal my car's antenna and replace it with theirs. Why? It won't help their reception...and theirs is different from mine. Stupid thief.
Oh yeah, and
Killed by orcs. Stupid orcs.
Lesser argh.
The previous argh was just letting out generic frustration...but today I'm finding myself dealing with a lesser argh. It's a bigger deal, but a lesser argh, if that makes any sense. I've been re-reading alot of philosophy books...having had therapy once again totally fail me, I'm trying to figure out what to do with what I'm feeling these days. I have a giant huge lump of anger in my gut right now, and I blew it off for a few months because I had something more important to deal with. But the anger is still sitting there festering, and that seriously bugs me. One piece of it...I don't want to let go of. I want revenge, and I don't want forgiveness stopping me if opportunity arises. That bastard ruined my last moments with Ryan, and I will never, ever, forgive him for it. The other piece...I want to let go of, but I don't have any way of doing it. I can't talk to the person. I can't offer up some olive branch, because I don't really want there to be peace...I just want there to be neutrality...and right now, I'm carrying so much pure unadulterated hatred that I can't be neutral, which bites. I'm just waiting for something to get said or done so that I can blow up, yell, get it out of my system, and bloody move on. I can't believe how horribly things I said in the past got misinterpreted...that in and of itself makes me angry. The way I got treated makes me angry. And don't even try to pull some psychoanalytic bullshit about no one makes you angry but yourself...that's crap. When someone rear ends your car, they do damage. You didn't make the dent; they did...all you can do is repair it. Problem is...I've still got things I want to say, and no means of saying them....makes repairing difficult if not impossible. And I'm not even sure I should say them. Would it do any good or just serve to re-open cauterized wounds?
Thoughts from the peanut gallery? Advice?
Saturday, September 07, 2002
AAAAAARRRRRGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Sorry...just had to get it out of my system. As you were. :-P
Pedophilic Lust Strikes Again
Damn it, I don't care if he has a tapioca head...and his dad is awfully swoon-worthy as well. Draco looking like he wants me (and we all know he does) and a link to an index of all the WB released shots from Chamber of Secrets, including Tom Riddle and Lucius Malfoy. The bad ones are *always* the best looking. In the immortal words of the woodpecker, Yum.
Friday, September 06, 2002
Pledge of Allegiance mess (again)
Awesome article from salon: http://www.salon.com/mwt/feature/2002/09/06/pledge/index.html A snippet:
Classroom karaoke
If California schools keep the words "under God" in the Pledge of Allegiance, there will be kids like I was, who will remain silent, move their lips and hope that patriotic peers don't catch them.
Thursday, September 05, 2002
Another horse, Another quiz
Wednesday, September 04, 2002
Another day, Another horse
I had my second riding lesson tonight. We learned to post, and to steer with our legs, and to do a two-point, which is when you stand up in the stirrups and lean really far forward. My thighs hurt. By the time I am done, I think I will be able to break a man's back with my thighs. I'm kinda looking forward to it. :) Having strong thighs, not breaking backs. I'm nice to backs, really. :)
Tuesday, September 03, 2002
The Most Unrealistic Attempt at a Rape Scene In The World
Buffy. There *is* a reason that I dislike this season (currently in repeats prepping us for the upcoming season). This ep is the one with the probably infamous "I want to have a rape scene but I'm on network so I can't so here's an attempted rape scene"-scene. WTF. Why is Buffy suddenly weak? It's like her body was taken over by Sarah Michelle Gellar...you know, a person who fights realistically for her size rather than as an insanely surrealistic superhero...we saw about three kitten-ish punches...this is supposedly the same character who in a night of passion with Spike tore down a house...and yet, in a moment of anger, she can't even throw him across the room? She can't punch him effectively? She can't even get him off her? WTF? More reason for hate...the villianization of Anya and Spike for their "affair"...um, last I checked, Buffy had told Spike it was over...Xander ditched Anya at the altar...neither Xander nor Buffy has reason to be pissed off at a fairly natural bonding of two totally screwed-over people. Oh and does Tara *EVER* go down on Willow? I've seen Willow head downward *so* many times...
Today's Links
9/1 Dilbert and 9/2 Dilbert. I swear Scott Adams works here somewhere...one of these is almost exactly a situation we had last week, and the other is a funnier version of an e-mail we got from Galvin this morning. :) Self-fulfilling prophecy... :)
A really good short story: 0wnz0red...sci-fi at salon.com...good stuff for the casual h4x0r...enough buzzwords to keep ya buzzing.
In case the name wasn't enough, boingboing.net is also a great link house. Includes links to bunches of nifty gadgetry as well as pictures of the recent RIAA hack.
And on that note, an adaptable letter to your Congressman regarding technology-related bills in Congress.
And of course, one cannot live without retro-pr0n for lesbians... :)
Monday, September 02, 2002
A Cautionary Tale
Due to mature adult content, viewer discretion is advised.
What the heck does that mean? Mature adult content? The warning preceded a showing of "There's Something About Mary" on Fox, which, at best, contains immature adult content...I hardly consider it to be mature adult content. :-P
In other news, I've had a wonderfully relaxing holiday weekend. I accomplished much, although I still haven't put my laundry away. I can't believe Sluggy Freelance is doing an HP parody, and worse yet, I can't believe I found out because I was reading Cassie Claire's LiveJournal. How far I've come. There was a time when Sluggy was the first page I pulled up every morning...and now I'll go days without looking at it. The plots got darker for awhile, and it was frustrating to be cliffhanging every day. It was easier on my anticipatory soul to just read it in bursts. Now, I'm working on three different fanfics simultaneously...and I fully recognize that none of them are going to be anywhere near as delightful to read as DD/DS/DV, and that upsets me. I can't figure out how to insert them into the timeline...after all Goblet of Fire kinda screwed us over...Snape's theoretically hanging with the Death Eaters as a spy, and all hell's broken loose because Voldemort is wandering around. Would they even do fifth year? Who knows... Do I just skip ahead gleefully and pretend that it's all been resolved? Or do I try to work some explanation in to give myself credulity? And why even bother with credulity when this is fanfic, fer pete's sake, and at least one of the ones I'm working on is intentionally tongue-in-cheek? ::sigh:: I think I'm becoming obsessive. I used to do this a long time ago...I'd pick some silly little focal point and all my energy would go into it...let's see...there was Lars Ulrich...and oh before that, John deLancie aka Q...my god, I wrote a fanfic friggin' novel over him...I should type it up. :) The thing had potential. In fact, I swear to this day that they stole my idea as I was young and stupid and gave it to about twenty different Trek-related people...and about 1-2 years later a surprisingly similar episode came out. Grr. Mine had a better ending. But granted, it required more actors as well. Let's see...there was also Lestat de Lioncourt for awhile...and the Purple Adept (moreso the Tan Adept, but he seemed unachievable)...um...then for a bit, I got distracted by reality. I think that's what triggers this...if my reality isn't exciting enough, I start turning to literature...or in one horrible case, Metallica ::shudder::...I wish someone had shot me before I'd hung all those posters up. At any rate...I'm not sure what that says about me. I'm only happy when it rains? It did rain today, and I loved it. I went splashing in the puddles, and I enjoyed the feeling of wet grass under my feet. Then I came in and pissed off my cat by petting her while my hands were wet. Heh. Yes, I'm evil.
I watched one of my stored episodes of Friends today...one I hadn't seen yet...where Rachel has her baby. And I cried like one...a baby, that is. That worries me too. Oh, and I'm worried about Joe and Angela. They're selling their house to move to a bigger one in the south suburbs. In a kinda rural area where there isn't even a Starbucks. And when I was talking to Chris the other day, he intimated that Angela isn't at all happy about moving. I don't blame her. But Joe seems to be doing it "for her"...because (I think) his goal right now is "get her pregnant, have family, grunt". And so he's getting this bigger house so that they don't have to move when the baby comes. You know, the theoretical baby that she hasn't even committed to yet. And yeah, it's cheaper to live down there in theory...but you have to figure in commute time and gas and all of that. And it just seems silly to me. They have spent this whole past year working on that house, and it's so beautiful now. I totally want to move into it myself. I wish I could, but there's no way I could make the mortgage payments on my own, and there's no one I could trust as a roommate that needs a place to live. And anyways, I'm worried because as much as I love Joe, he occasionally has too much in common with Chris...and I am worried that he's "I am man, I make decisions"-ing his way to doing something stupid that Angela doesn't really want to do and that will end up making both of them unhappy. I wish I could feel like I know they are thinking this through. I mean, my God, it took him six months to decide on a car, but he made the decision to move out and buy a new house over about 3 weeks. That worries me. It's not like him. They're already packing!!! But, they're adults...they can take care of themselves...and if they can't, then there's that whole weak and stupid wolves eat them thing...but I like them. I don't want them to be weak and stupid and eaten by wolves.
But then I'm not much of one to talk on the good decision making front. I'm about to give y'all way more information than I should, but oh well....I need to get this off my chest. I have wanted to start getting maid service since the beginning of this year...I've just been putting it off in various ways...and of course, it didn't even cross my mind for the entire May-June period. (If you don't know why, go west, young man, to the archives!) So I finally made calls, got estimates...and I'm all set up to start service in 2 weeks. Only...it suddenly occurred to me that paying for that means that I will no longer have $1000 in "free" money (i.e., money that is not assigned to a bill...for groceries, gas, entertainment, etc) every month. Okay, I know, I know...I'm so totally Egypt bitching because my people are dying when I have nine cities and no one else has more than seven (and I can't believe I'm *still* using that). Some of my friends are worrying about just covering basic needs bills and here I am wondering if I can make it on $800 in free money a month...hell, my parents are living paycheck to paycheck, and look at what I'm doing. A cooler daughter would be helping them out by now. But, my own selfish whinging aside, this is my dilemma. I have around 28K in student loans. I have around 4-5K on credit cards. My car has about 6K left to pay off. And I was planning on taking $500 a month and devoting to payoff of credit cards. Right now, I'm spending $300 per month toward that purpose, and that doesn't count against that "free" money earlier discussed. I use about $200 per week for expenses...leaves me $200 out of that "free" money to add to the credit card payoff goal...except that now...now, I'm looking at taking on a monthly bill of around $120 so that I can have someone else clean my floors. On one hand, I say to myself, it's so totally worth it because it will give me time to do other things, and I'm one of those people who has to be somewhere semi-neat in order to feel like my brain is screwed in right. Me having a messy apartment is the easy way of seeing that I'm not doing well...either I'm too busy or I'm depressed. And the reason being that when I'm in a "normal" mood, I do basic cleaning as part of my relaxation...it's brainless activity and it's almost meditative for me. But, the thing is, I love doing organizing tasks...and neatening...I don't like getting down on my hands and knees and scrubbing a floor or a bathtub or what-have-you. Darn it, I can't tell you how many manicures I've ruined. :) I'm kidding. :) But, point being...I'm beginning to think that it's not worth it. Shouldn't I pay off those damn cards first? Hmm.
And this is why I wrote all of this...because I've come to a conclusion now. :) See, X, I told you this was like a pensieve! :) At least for me. I think it is for you too. But back to my point, okay, I want some basic scrubbing cleaning done around here. I don't want to do it myself. I've lived here for 2 years to get this place to the point that it is now. Maybe it would make more sense to just have the maid service be on-call...have them be familiar with my apartment and my bank account and my needs...but only come when I really want them to come, when it's bad again. And then...this month, I spend that $120 on a thorough cleaning...and next month, maybe I get it done again, maybe I don't. Then I can still devote income to the CCs. I like that plan. It's the "I want cake and eating it too" approach. :) And...I can also see if maybe I can cut back expenses. If I ate out less, it might be cheaper...although I doubt it. Definitely healthier but doubtfully cheaper. It really is pretty cheap to eat out. We'll see. I can't believe I just bitched about something so...so...petty. That's the only word I can think of, but it isn't accurate. ::sigh:: Oh well. At least I figured things out. Which is more than I can say for alot of people.
